Problem with dating beautiful women
Now you could be absolutely stunning (in which case you're both smart AND pretty and everyone hates you except for me -- call me, like, immediately), but your identity is still bound up in being The Smart One.
Or knows exactly how to arch your back, flip your hair and glance at that handsome hunk just so such that he comes on over to say hi. By virtue (or vice) of being smart, you eliminate most of the planet's inhabitants as a dating prospect.To put it plainly, you are programmed to reproduce. Let's say by "smart" we mean "in the top 5 percent of the population in terms of intelligence and education." Generally speaking, smart people seek out other smart people to hang out with, simply because they get bored otherwise.Now quit thinking you're smarter than the 3 billion base pairs in your genome and 4 billion years of evolution. And if they're going to spend a lot of time with someone, intelligence in a partner is pretty much a requirement. Now, luckily, the world's kinda big, so the remaining 5 percent of the gender of your choice is still a plentiful 160 million or so people.Of course, as noted above, things only get worse once you graduate.And if you're frustrated with your love life, you just might try to compensate by working harder and achieving even more to fill that void.In fact, the smarter you are, the more clueless you will be, and the more problems you're going to have in your dating life. Smart people spent more time on achievements than on relationships when growing up. And smart families are usually achievement-oriented. The upshot of all that achievement is that you get into a top college -- congratulations!
Once upon a day I used to be pretty smart, and believe me, I had a lock on clueless. -- and then continue doing even more of what you were doing before.
So if they had challenges then, it gets about 1,000 times worse once they're tossed from the warm womb of their alma mater. For simple things, it takes someone smart to really screw it up. Take piano, violin, tennis, swimming and Tibetan throat-singing lessons. Be "well-rounded." Well, you're a talented little bugger. At the same time, there's an opportunity cost associated with achievement.
From my observations, the following dating challenges seem to be common to most smart people. So whether you went (or should have gone) to the likes of Harvard, Yale, Princeton, MIT, Stanford, Columbia, Cornell, Swarthmore, Amherst, Dartmouth, Brown, Oxford, Cambridge, Berkeley, Penn, Caltech, Duke, read on: 1. Time spent studying, doing homework, and practicing the violin is time not spent doing other things -- like chasing boys or girls, which turns out is fairly instrumental in making you a well-rounded human.
The writing of the books was precipitated by the endemic dating woes on the Harvard campus as I observed them as an advisor and, earlier, indulged in them as a student.
Those kids graduate and pretty much continue to have the same dating woes -- only now with fewer single people around who happen to live in the same building and share meals with them every day.
From then on, that was your principal identity: The Smart One.